Monday, April 14, 2014

Really a Zombie Novel

I swear, if this place were a Zombie novel, we'd have everything we need. We even have a comedy cop.
The last time I saw that guy - skinny, blond, Swede-thing- he was cruising that bad intersection that bottlenecks out of the west end of Port Angeles, hitting everybody who got so confused when they tried to negotiate that scrambled mess. They've done their best to try to safely bring three roads together, with stop lights and crossing zones, but that it still looks like a mini version of Seattle's "retarded octopus" freeway system. One speeding logging truck that dumps its load, and the whole town would be locked down for the day.

Speaking of that, looks like somebody reassigned Goofy out on Highway 112, and told him to watch out for overloaded logging trucks. So, of course, he stops everybody in a beater pickup with a load of firewood. 

We got a loader up here in the clearcuts who must be on something; all his trucks are flopped into the beds with all the butts pointing the same direction, so they're heaped to slide out the back of the bed. And what's with piling the load up over the left side of the truck? - so when some driver who's never been up here and has no clue of where the speed signs are, takes a hard curve 20 miles over the curve recommendation, the whole load leans like a ship with a bad ballast. There's a reason the guys on "Axman" have to get their teeth fixed. Nobody cares about the staggering walks and ragged filth out in the woods. The animals manage to stay clean in the woods; I guess only a zombie would look that busted-up in nature.
Those drivers scare the crap out of me. Where is somebody supposed to go if one of them comes at a person and goes over the line? A ditch? Just my luck, if it ever happens, there will be a cyclist on the side of the road, in that skinny strip on the other side of the white line. Some "Scenic Route." No place for a bike, and they clearcut the only State park - probably to steal the maple trees.

I'll bet that's where that new "Hardwoods" store in Port Angeles got them from. I'll bet a walk in the woods without looking over my shoulders or sniffing for things that smell dead.

Not that Officer Goofy would track any of those loads down. Too busy making sure his lights and siren are on so he can speed through small towns, and then turn 'em off when he gets on the highway.

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